I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this. I can’t imagine how difficult and stressful this must be for you. My thoughts are with you! As far as telling the guy, personally, I think I would. It’s really is about the timing, however. You could wait until after the procedure to tell him. If you’re going to tell him before, be sure to make it clear that you are firm on your decision and it is not changing (it’s your body and ultimately your choice to make). If you are in a relationship with him and wish to continue it, I would tell him before, as dishonesty tends to crush any relationship eventually. If you’re not with him and don’t wish to be, you can definitely wait until after. I hope this helps you and I wish you the best of luck and good health. <3

See, you shouldn’t be afraid of the person you’re with. You CAN leave. Let people in. Tell your mom and/or best friend what going on and let them help you out of this. His anger and abuse is only going to get worse through time, whether you cover your bruises or not. This is unhealthy, sweetheart. Be healthy, be happy — do the right thing.

I promise it’s not. There’s nothing fine about abuse.

If you didn’t see anything wrong with him hurting you, you wouldn’t feel the need to cover the bruises. Trust your instincts. You know this is wrong. He does mean to hurt you. Otherwise, he wouldn’t keep doing it, or even do it in the first place. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you are still very young. You shouldn’t fear leaving him. You will find someone MUCH better. I promise you. You have all the time in the world. You don’t need to settle for him and his abuse.

Tell me how it is complicated? I’d like to understand. 

Me too! No problem.

It IS his fault. Abuse is uncalled for NO MATTER WHAT. True love doesn’t make room for violence. You are not going to be able to make him treat you better. If he were any bit inclined to treat you differently, he would be doing so, but he is not. Abusive partners are MUCH more likely to become more abusive than to ever stop being abusive. You deserve better than him, his violence, and the excuses you’re making for him. Why stay in a situation that causes you all kinds of pain? Would you stand in front of a baseball shooter, knowing that it can and will hit you at any time, and not move away? No. He can say he loves you, but if he really, truly did, he wouldn’t abuse you. He is degrading you, humiliating you, bruising you, saddening you, and otherwise harming you in all sorts of ways, and the longer you let him do this to you, the worse it will get. The worse he will hurt you, the worse you’re heart and mind will suffer. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, I BEG OF YOU — GET OUT NOW. As soon as you’re next alone with plenty of time, don’t tell him you’re going, just call a friend of family member you trust who will take you in. Pack up all of your belongings (if you live together, take everything of yours; if you live apart, take enough of your belongings to last you 2 weeks). Block his phone number immediately, and as soon as you can, change your phone number. This may seem drastic, but trust me, you’ll regret it if you don’t. You do NOT want him to be able to find you, talk to you, or see you at all. Stay out of his grasp, or you WILL get hurt. If he tries to contact you in any way, call the police. They will help to keep you safe. Once things are under control and there is NO RISK OF HIM CONTACTING YOU in ANY WAY, go back home, start fresh, and live your live abuse free. I really, really hope you head my words. I hope you’ll write me back and keep me updated. You may be a stranger, but I care for your wellbeing and I won’t stand for you to be hurt. <3 Take care of yourself.

Well, it sounds like you’ve done all you can do for now. I guess you’ll just have to wait and see what happens. :( Perhaps there was some phone malfunction (lost, stolen, broken, etc.) and he is unable to reach you. Or, maybe he just changed his mind for some reason, which seems unlikely to me… Maybe, if you’re friends on FB, you can see if he’s mentioned having phone issues. If not, you could message him (NOT NOW - wait a a few more days) and say something along the lines of, “Hey, I haven’t heard from you in a while! Just wanted to see how you are and if you still want to meet up some time. Either way, I hope you doing great! :)”. If that doesn’t yield a reply, I’d give up and move on, especially if he is active on FB (i.e. posting statuses, etc.). I hope that helps! Good luck — I really hope everything works out!

You should free up next weekend and text him to tell him you’re ready to claim that raincheck. :) He may think YOU have lost interest because you said no to the date and haven’t been texting him. He probably pulled back to see what you’d do, and the conversation ceased so he might have taken that as rejection. Honestly, I think texting rules are stupid and I don’t tend to follow them and I’ve seen no repercussions thus far. Just because you were the last person to text yesterday night doesn’t mean you can’t be the first person to text the next day. While it’s bad to seem desperate, you should want to seem interested rather than too busy for him. I’m sure you’ll find a good middle ground. Just don’t forget that guys want to feel wanted just the same as you. Good luck and I hope this helps! <3